I’ve seen the word “passport” so many times now that it is beginning to look stupid.

After countless visits to the Post Office, 3 check-throughs (only one of which they charged me for), my passport application has now been completed and sent off. Hopefully to return in 3-6 weeks. The person who checked through it this time was quite a laid-back man in his 50s. He spoke as if he’d done too many drugs in the past, and he had an odd twinkle in his eyes. He was smiling, too. He spoke to me when he was checking everything, and was a really nice guy. Quite the opposite to the snotty, tight-fisted, stuck up, pessamistic bitch that looked through it last time, who was negative about everything: “It will take 6 weeks”.

So, once the guy checked it through and confirmed that everything was okay. He asked me if I wanted to insure the additional documents (the passport and birth certificates) for an extra £3, so I agreed. We spoke about how crazily expensive it is to get a passport, how much work goes into it and how poorly documented it is. He then told me that everything looks fine, and whilst you can’t fast-track it (contrary to what the website says) it will return in 3 to 6 weeks, and if they need any extra information they will contact me. So the worst that can happen is that they telephone/email for some additional information.

I was so happy when I handed over the £80 and got £4 change that I nearly kissed him. I grinned, said “Excellent. Thanks a lot” and left the Post Office like some giggling freak. I doubt anyone has ever seen someone look so ecstatic after leaving the Post Office.

THANK YOU MR. POST OFFICE MAN!