I went to the bathroom to have a shower, and noticed that the Argos catalogue (The Laminated Book of Dreams (Bill Bailey)) was on the side, next to the toilet. Obviously this brought me to the conclusion that somebody in the house (not me) had been reading it whilst sat on the toilet.

Now, fair enough, some people do enjoy reading whilst in the bathroom. Can’t blame them for that. I had a friend who had this huge stack of guitar tablature magazines and books next to the toilet. I’m hoping that they didn’t go quite as far as taking a 3/4-sized classical guitar into the bathroom with them, to strum out some of their favourite rock ‘n’ roll riffs. I didn’t stay around long enough to find out, to be honest.

But seriously, why would you look at the Argos catalogue whilst sat on the toilet? Is someone really going to sit there with a pen and think “Hmm, what do we need in the house?” and start circling things with a big red marker? What? No!

Where does the context of bathroom reading end, though? Do you have faith-consumed christian men with The Holy Bible sat neatly next to their altar of defecation (sorry, couldn’t resist saying it)? That does put forth an interesting scene, though… You’re at a friend’s house, and use the bathroom, only to find that there is no toilet paper, but a nice, clean copy of The Holy Bible propped against the wall. I’m pretty sure that wiping with the bible does count as sacrilege. Heh, I suppose when you find someone who has “Psalms” or “Songs of Solomon” printed into their lower-region, you know that you’ve either found the right or wrong person. No doubt about that.